Over the years I’ve had many half-assed attempts at blogging, but I never stuck with it, and today I realized why. I was too busy trying to please people and be commercial that I was not being true to myself. That’s why they always failed, personal blogs are supposed to be, well, personal. (Duh.)
So now that I’ve come to this realization, I need to do something with the information I’ve had showered down upon me, figuratively speaking.
When trying to come up with reasons that I could not be a successful Internet entity before, this was usually the list:
1. I’m not particularly interesting.
Let’s face it, I’m a single mom working 8-5 as a receptionist in Toronto. I have a few mental health issues I’m working on. I barely get to go out and do social things anymore, not because I can’t but more because I feel guilty about having a life when my daughter is stuck with (our awesome) babysitter.
2. The things that are interesting about me are appealing to very niche markets.
I like fashion (plus and regular), occult art, witchcraft, Ancient Kemet and reading YA novels. I don’t often have time to pursue most of these hobbies anymore because of reasons, (see #1) but again these are self-imposed limitations. Again, I was too worried about being popular and not being myself.
3. I’m as photogenic as a menopausal toad.
Ok, that’s being harsh, but my preconceived notions of successful people always have attractiveness factored in there somewhere. Now, 1 child and countless body positivity articles later, I am well on my way to accepting myself body and soul.
4. I don’t have a particular breath-taking talent.
This I consider to be partly true. The world will never see my amazing crafts on Pintrest or a me singing a chart-topping cover on Youtube. But after I face-palmed myself, I realized that writing is my talent, so a blog would probably be a good place to showcase it.
5. I can be very opinionated.
And people might not like it. I am sarcastic, politically incorrect and very bull headed. I see things liberally and move against the crowd. But, like they say, haters gonna hate.
6. Why would anyone listen to me anyways?
The last reason I told myself was that I couldn’t blog because I didn’t have a voice. Now I see that was because I was trying to be someone I really wasn’t, trying to be someone marketable and popular when in reality, I just need to be me.
So there they are. The reasons that I shouldn’t blog. Or so I thought. Now that I’ve thought about it, these are all the reasons I SHOULD be blogging. I’m an average person with average challenges who faces them head on and still manages to be unique in this world.
I’m not perfect and I’m not a social butterfly but goddammit I have a voice and I will share it with the world.
So here I go, consider this your warning.
Sam is going to write.